The end of the honeymoon stage

loveDating is a beaut. You meet someone special and the more time you spend with each other the more crazy you feel. Your infatuation takes hold of the rational part of your brain and you spend as much time as you can with the person. Between 2 months – 2 years though, you begin to notice a change. Things aren’t as exciting as they once were. You’re not getting the same amount of attention or affection. Your activities together are becoming routine, you’re seeing each other too much and fights begin to happen.

Don’t freak out!!! This is the end of your honeymoon phase. What does this mean? Will you overcome it? If you’re like me and only used to casual dating, this phase will definitely surprise you. Your first reaction: lets breakup!

Here are a few things to consider before calling it quits:

  1. Face your fear of commitment – If you’re not used to long-term relationships, this is a good time to overcome your fear of commitment. No relationship is perfect and it’s completely normal for the lovey dovey stuff to get dramatically reduced. Think about what you need in the long-term and consider the following steps.
  2. Realize this doesn’t have to be the end, but the beginning of a new phase – Many relationships end at this stage because one or both partners is addicted to the butterflies. Some people only like the beginning of things and will want to run away and start fresh with someone new. You have to realize though that this phase is inevitable in every relationship and even the most romantic of relationships will face it.
  3. Accept your partner for who they are – At this point you’ve probably heard your partner fart, walked in on them in the washroom and seen them at their worst. Now it’s up to you to decide whether it’s worth maintaining this relationship or is it time to say goodbye.
  4. Learn to communicate effectively – Communication is definitely key in every relationship but this is when it’s the most important. You need to set some time to discuss your feelings with your partner. If they care about you they’ll listen and hear you out. You can both talk about where you’re at and what you don’t like about each other. Talking about it can help you get those things off your chest and decide what to do next, together!
  5. Take some time off – Take a week off from each other. Give yourselves a chance to miss what you had. If you had something worth keeping you’ll re-unite and get back to where you were. The beauty of this is that the time off will give you a taste of life without your partner. You’ll either love it or miss your partner and decide it’s not the end after all.
  6. Go on an exciting date – Try something new! Go out together and treat it like your first date. This’ll help the excitement return to your relationship.
  7. Remember, this too shall pass – If your relationship is strong enough, it’ll withstand the test of time. Don’t worry too much and go with the flow. You don’t have to hear from your partner 24/7 to know you’re together. The comfort that comes with the end of the honeymoon stage is the most beautiful part of it. You’re not anxious anymore. You know what you have is real and that you’re both committed to making it work. You’ve said what you needed to say and can now relax. See where this phase can take you and don’t call it quits just because you’ve reached the end of a preliminary stage in your relationship. Remember, time is key and patience is a virtue.

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